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How to Make his Heart Pound

Matchmaker Advice on How to Make his Heart Pound

If there’s one question we hear more than any other, it’s “how do I make him want me?” And we’re not the only ones. Google searches for “texts to make him want me” are through the roof! And in any given episode of The Bachelor, the all-elusive ‘connection’ is mentioned more times than we can count (we don’t recommend the Bachelor drinking game for that exact reason).

But, ladies, we understand. Chemistry can feel so out of your control, it’s natural to worry and wonder if he feels any of the attraction you feel. And with article after article claiming “men are visual creatures,” it’s easy to feel like a heart-stopping romance is the prerogative of the celebrity beautiful. Well, we have good news and bad news…

…It’s not just physical; it’s how you make him feel.

After all, if it were purely physical, no attractive person would ever be home alone watching Netflix on a Saturday night (and we’ve all been there). But the bad news is this means you’re going to have to put in some effort when you’re ready to make the connection. No more sitting around waiting for proverbial lightning to strike. If you’ve gotten yourself a matchmaker or a dating coach, you’re already halfway there! But since we won’t be dating for you, here are our top tips to get him falling for you:

Compliment and appreciate him

Men LOVE compliments—sometimes they just have a hard time admitting it. Typically, men are expected to do more complimenting of others than receiving kind words and they often receive fewer romantic compliments than their partners. Sounds exhausting. Listen to him, notice him, and let him know what you appreciate. He might not know how to respond at first, but he might start to feel like he can relax with you and lower his defenses. And isn’t that a big part of what a relationship is about, after all?

Don’t be afraid to let him see that you’re trying to connect

Playing hard to get may sound sexy, but it rarely works. A relationship is reciprocal, give-and-take, so anyone ready for a relationship is looking for that. Real effort to connect with someone is the biggest non-verbal compliment you can give. It shows that you acknowledge and accept the other person, and everyone loves that feeling.

Get into Body Language

Nonverbal communication is key. Most communication occurs through nonverbal cues, and honestly, our human brains are not as great multitaskers as we think. We can barely process audial and visual information at the same time. So take some time to just listen and observe. Notice what topics excite him, what stories light him up. You’ll learn more about your date and about his interest level in you from these nonverbal cues than from all the witty repartee in the book.

Don’t Worry, Be Happy

Yep, Bobby McFerrin had it right. We’ve seen it time and time again, happy people are much more attractive and get more dates. Just trust us, you look great when you smile! And once you’ve made him feel listened to, appreciated, excited, and happy, he won’t be able to wait for your next date!

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