While on the phone with my fellow Matchmaker Erica Arrechea of Cinqe Matchmaking, we spoke about common frustrations our clients over 50 express to us quite often. Among these frustrations, we noticed many of the issues had to do with conversation imbalance, non-verbal communication and misconception on what each sex wants in a partner.
Read on for Erica’s 3 key pieces of advice for those working their way through the 50+ dating pool.
1. Think of Dates as Adventures
Rather than the traditional sit across from each other over dinner and a glass of wine date, choose a nice, cozy bar or lounge and order an appetizer. Sit next to one another rather than sitting across from one another as this creates more opportunity for intimacy and physical contact. Men, you’re able to caress her back and ladies, you’re able to rest a hand on his knee. If the evening continues to go well, take a casual stroll down the walking strip. You don’t always need to go to a 5-star restaurant; a relaxed, classy bar helps keep the mood light and less stressful. Chemistry has a higher chance of happening within a calm, easy going environment.
2. Listen More, Speak Less
There are few things worse than going out with someone and hearing them only talk continuously about themselves and never ask about you. Sure, it’s a nervous habit for some to verbally vomit when in anxious situations, though try to take the pressure off of yourself by asking your date about their own lives. Great questions to ask would be “what’s your passion?” and “where would you love to travel to?” If you completely blank and there’s too much silence, start telling one another stories. Try not to make the date so serious. Focus on enjoying one another’s company rather than mentally trying to decide on whether they’ll be your next spouse.
3. Be Open To Change
A common misconception among older single women is that a majority of men their age only want to date much younger than their age group. While there are guys who want to date a woman half their age, a good amount of men do want to date women their own age. We always say that men go down 10 years and women go up 10 years, but that isn’t always the case. You have to keep an optimistic and open mindset in your dating life. Love can happen, you just have to remain open. The more open you are, the better your chances of finding genuine love.
Looking for love in the Los Angeles, Silicon Valley, or Orange County areas? Connect with Erica by emailing her at love@cinqe.com or by joining at Cinqe.com/join.