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What if you want to get serious, but your partner still wants to date others?

  • Posted by: ElegantIntroductions
  • in Dating Advice

You want to get serious, but your partner’s still dating others. There’s one thing to do: talk about it!

Say you’ve met a special someone. You’ve got a lot in common and the sparks fly easily. You’re dating each other more often, and you can’t wait to see each other again.

It’s all fantastic. Then you realize that you don’t want to date anyone else—and you wonder whether your mate feels the same way.

As elite Jewish matchmakers, we know that relationships are both wonderful and complicated. Yes, some dating couples seriously fall for each other at the same pace. But more often than not, one partner arrives at the “let’s get serious” level faster than the other. Of course that’s usually the partner who says it’s time to toss any “little black books” and delete all dating site profiles. But what if the other partner isn’t quite there yet?

This is where a well-thought-out communication plan comes in very handy. Calmly but firmly, tell your partner that you don’t want to date anyone else, and you hope the feeling is mutual. If it is, mazel tov. If it isn’t, that’s where things can get tricky.

You need to find out why your partner isn’t quite ready for exclusivity. Be inquisitive, but not judgmental. There are some valid reasons why your partner wants to take things slower than you. Maybe he’s got other things going on in his life that make him a little hesitant about taking the relationship to the next level. Maybe she still needs a little more convincing that this relationship is “the one.” These may not be the answers you want to hear, but they should be handled with patience and understanding.

There is, of course, one circumstance that should raise a big red flag: when your partner won’t even think about dating you exclusively. This usually means that they’re not as ready for a serious relationship as they say they are. It could also mean that they’re not as in to you as they say they are. Either way, it’s probably best to be realistic and move on.

At Elegant Introductions, we help singles sort out these types of issues all the time. Sure, we’re all about matching up fabulous Jewish singles. However, we follow up with them and stay connected to them long after the dating starts. We can help you determine whether your partner just needs a little more time to get serious—or whether there’s little chance of getting serious at all.

It all comes back to what you’ve probably heard all your life: when you’re relationship is absolutely right, you’ll know it. It’s just that some people “know it” faster than others.

If you’re single and looking for that special Jewish soulmate, we’re here to help. To learn more about Elegant Introductions, call Barbara and Nancy today at 305-615-1900 or contact us for more information.

 

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